PE-49: Polite Requests, Offers and Permission
The same request at five levels of politeness — how to ask, offer and invite in English without ever sounding rude by accident.
PE-49: Polite Requests, Offers and Permission
Here is something no grammar table will tell you: in English, being direct is often felt as being rude. "Give me your pen" is perfect grammar and terrible manners. English wraps its requests in modal verbs, and the longer the wrapping, the more polite it sounds. This lesson gives you the whole ladder — for asking, offering, and asking permission.
In this lesson you will learn
- The politeness ladder for requests
- How to ask for permission at every level
- How to make offers and invitations
- The Would you mind…? trap, where "no" means "yes"
1. Asking somebody to do something
1Friends and family
Can you pass me the salt?
2Neutral and safe
Could you help me, please?
3More formal
Would you open the window?
4Most polite
Would you mind waiting a moment?
Could you tell me the way to the station, please?
Vokzalga qanday borishni ayta olasizmi, iltimos?
Could you + please is the safest combination with a stranger.
2. Asking for permission
Here the subject changes to I — you are asking to do something yourself.
Everyday → formal
- Can I borrow your pen?
- Could I ask you something?
- May I come in? (most respectful)
- Do you mind if I open the window?
Ways to answer
- Yes: Of course. / Certainly. / Sure. / Go ahead.
- No: I'm afraid not. / Sorry, I'd rather you didn't.
— May I leave early today? — Of course, no problem.
— Bugun erta ketsam maylimi? — Albatta, muammo yoʻq.
3. Offers and invitations
Now you are the one giving. English uses shall, would like and can here.
- Offering to do something: Shall I carry that for you? · Can I help you?
- Offering a thing: Would you like some tea? · Would you like a biscuit?
- Inviting: Would you like to come to my birthday?
- Suggesting together: Shall we go now? · Why don't we take a taxi?
4. The "Would you mind…?" trap
This phrase literally asks: "would it be a problem for you?" So the polite answer that means yes, I'll do it is a negative one.
— Would you mind closing the door? — Not at all. (= I'll close it happily)
— Eshikni yopib yuborsangiz maylimi? — Albatta, bemalol.
Answering "Yes" here would mean "yes, it is a problem for me"!
Note the form too: after mind comes the -ing form, never the infinitive — Would you mind waiting?, and for permission Do you mind if I wait?
5. Common mistakes
Give me your book. (to a stranger)
Could you lend me your book, please?
Would you mind to open the window?
Would you mind opening the window?
Do you want to drink some tea? (to a guest)
Would you like some tea?
Shall you help me?
Could you help me? (shall is only for I and we)
I will like a coffee, please.
I'd like a coffee, please. (would like)
Practice
1 You need a stranger to repeat something. What do you say?
Show answer
Could you say that again, please? (or Sorry, would you mind repeating that?)
2 — Would you mind waiting five minutes? How do you say yes?
Show answer
Not at all. / Of course not. / No problem.
A negative answer means agreement, because the question asks whether it bothers you.
3 Correct it: Would you like coming to my party?
Show answer
Would you like to come to my party?
Would like takes to + verb; only mind takes -ing.
4 Offer to help someone carrying heavy bags.
Show answer
Shall I help you with those? / Can I give you a hand?
5 Which is most polite? (a) Open the window. (b) Can you open the window? (c) Would you mind opening the window?
Show answer
(c) is the most polite, (b) is normal and friendly, (a) is an order — fine for a close friend, rude to a stranger.
Key words — Kalit soʻzlar
- Requestiltimos
- Offertaklif
- Invitationtaklifnoma
- Permissionruxsat
- Politexushmuomala
- Rude / bluntqoʻpol
- To mindmalol kelmoq
- Of coursealbatta
- I'm afraid notafsuski, yoʻq
- To give a handyordam bermoq
🎯 Remember this
- Requests: Can you → Could you → Would you → Would you mind…?
- Permission: Can I → Could I → May I → Do you mind if I…?
- Offers: Shall I…? · Would you like…? — not Do you want…?
- After mind use -ing; after would like use to + verb.
- Would you mind…? — answer "Not at all" to say yes.